Watch out!

“Watch out!” yelled Jim, violently pushing Scott down to the ground. Scott had been looking the other way to see if the swings were free and didn't see it coming.

“Look at him. He’s gonna cry.” Jim mocked. The other kids on the playground, at least the ones close by, were all looking now. Scott wasn’t crying before, but as soon as Jim said it, he could feel the hot tears starting to form.

“What’s a matter, did that hurt?” Jim taunted him again.

“No,” Scott replied, trying to make his voice sound normal and not like it was about to break.

He didn’t know what to do. He wasn’t really afraid of Jim, but he knew he couldn’t beat him in a fight.

He didn’t want to be standing here with everyone staring at him.

He just wanted to be on the swings.

He just wanted to enjoy his recess.

Just then, the teacher blew her whistle, letting everyone know it was time to come in. Jim just smirked and walked away. The others followed, some because he was the leader and others because the show was over.

In class, Scott’s mind wandered to other things. He was still annoyed at being pushed down, but he was distracted thinking about Karli, who was sitting two rows in front of him, and her long auburn hair. He also thought about Block Architect, and the world he was building in the game. He thought of some ideas on how to make the main structure look cooler, without sacrificing its structural integrity.

After school, he cut through the playground on his usual route home. He was almost through the soccer field when he noticed Jim and a couple of his disciples running toward him from behind. He thought about running, but he was still too far away from his house to outrun them.

Jim came to a stop beside him. “You like mud?” he asked. Jim wasn’t particularly creative.

“Not really,” Scott replied hesitantly.

“I bet you haven’t even tried it,” Jim taunted. Suddenly Jim and his friends grabbed Scott by the legs, dragging him across the field towards the mud pit by the goal net. Soon, they dropped him right in the big mud puddle, soaking his clothes.

They laughed and walked away. There was nothing for Scott to do but pick himself up, retrieve his backpack from where he dropped it and go home.

When he got home he looked at his clothes in the mirror. His favorite shirt was covered in mud and grass stains, completely ruined.

.  .  .

15 YEARS LATER

He felt on top of the world as he walked down the hallway of his hospital. Six months ago, he had graduated from med school. Now, at age 25, he was a surgical intern at the top local hospital. Being a doctor felt natural to him, like he was on the right path. He loved the respect that came with it and the admiration, even jealousy, that others felt seeing him at a young age starting a promising career.

Suddenly, he saw a familiar face in the hallway. “Holy Shit!” he exclaimed, “Is that you Scott?”

Scott looked as surprised as him.

“It’s me. Jim. I haven’t seen you since middle school when your family moved.”

“Oh, hey, Jim. Yeah, it’s been a while.”

“I know. How are things going with you?”

“Oh, fine. I’m just here for an appointment. So, um, do you work here?”

“Yeah,” Jim replied, “I’m an intern. I’ll be starting my residency next year.”

“Oh wow, that’s really cool,” said Scott, looking mostly at the floor.

“Yeah, so what are you up to these days?” asked Jim.

“Oh, I’m working at this call center right now, but I’m thinking about taking classes at the community college.”

“You should do that,” said Jim. “It’s never too late to start”.

“Yeah.”

“Well hey, it was good running into you,” said Jim. He did have work to do, but mostly he just felt awkward and didn’t know what else to say.

“You too,” replied Scott.

As Scott got in his car, he started feeling hot. He had been fine the entire walk. At first, he hadn’t felt anything but mild surprise regarding his encounter with Jim. The more he thought about it, however, the angrier he became. He never remembered Jim being particularly smart, although he didn’t see his schoolwork when they were kids. He just couldn’t help but think that Jim was wrong for a job like that. There’s no way that helping people could be his life’s calling.

Back at home, Scott opened the box in his closet and took out the 9mm Beretta he kept there. He didn’t know much about guns. Just that 9mm were supposed to be good. Sometimes cops carry them. This one wasn’t too expensive. It was loaded, just like he’d left it.

He felt an array of emotions as he drove back to the hospital: excitement, nervousness, and anger. These feelings mixed together with no single one dominating the others.

When he arrived at the hospital, Scott headed in through the front door to the Emergency room. He walked into the waiting room, looking around to see who was there. No one he knew. There was no reason to expect Jim would be there in the room.

He drew the gun from his pocket smoothly. Only one person actually noticed--a middle-aged man whose look suggested puzzlement bordering on alarm, like he was waiting to see what Scott would do.

Slowly but deliberately, Scott placed the gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger.

. . .

“Did you know him well?” asked Dr. Kerensky.

Dr. Kerensky had been a mentor to Jim since he started his internship, and Jim frequently went to him for advice. When he first learned that the suicide in the ER was actually Scott, he was shocked. Kerensky was the first person he had really talked to about it.

“Not really,” Jim replied. “I hadn’t seen him in years. I saw him right before it happened though. I just feel like I should have noticed something was off.”

“This is one of the hardest parts about being a doctor,” Kerensky said. “It’s why they stress detachment so much in med school. We do everything we can, but in the end, we have to accept that we can’t save everyone.”

“I know,” said Jim. “I guess this is the first time it happened with someone I knew.”

“This is an important part of your development then,” Kerensky replied, “because it won’t be the last.”